Aubin Palmer (00:02)
Hello, Power Women. I am here with you tonight from California. I wish I lived in California. Well, I love living in Utah, but I love visiting California as well. And I'm here on a family trip and planned on getting this episode recorded before I left and did not. But I love the freedom and power we have as online
business careers, we can do whatever we want whenever we want. We can work after our kids go to bed on a trip if we want to. And that's what I decided to do tonight. And having some time to decompress and just focus on the stuff I love actually helps rejuvenate me on a family trip. I don't know how you feel on family trips, but I don't feel like it's a full vacation when I'm with the family because you're still in charge of a lot of stuff you still have.
to help the kids and so having some alone time for myself on our family trip gives me that escape and re-centering for myself. So this is actually very helpful and therapeutic for me to still get to talk with you tonight. And I love thinking of this podcast as really just talking with you and hopefully what I share will.
Reach you and connect with you and as it has helped me recenter tonight, it will help you wherever you're doing, wherever you are to recenter as well. And this idea that I wanted to talk about tonight is so important in being a power woman. It is probably one of the most important facets of being in power. And I decided to call this, do you really know yourself?
And I emphasize the word really there because it's, fascinating as we get older and grow up into adulthood and get past some of the younger self things we thought were us and realize that it's not as much about what other people think. It's not as much about the external labels. Who are we then really?
And this can feel like an identity crisis for a lot of people. And especially when you are figuring out yourself as an entrepreneur and figuring out what you want to do and create, it can be easy to let that become your identity. But that isn't. You are you. And when I say yourself, I mean your true inner self, your essential self, your higher self, your future self.
your soul, your aligned self, your centered self. These are different terms I've used that I've heard in different places to describe this true, authentic self even that's inside of all of us.
and there is no label for it. Even mother, or entrepreneur, or coach, or musician, or creator, whatever labels you do use with your life, wife, daughter, friend, whatever title even you can use, that is not your true authentic self.
And unfortunately many people go through life never knowing this true self, this authentic self. And you can get by without knowing it.
knowing her.
but when you really come to know her...
It just reshifts everything for you. And I was talking with Power Women Collective this morning, my new group program that I started today officially again while I was on the trip because I can. And it was such a powerful call and we talked. It was a workshop call day where we go into some teaching and discuss things and work on it together as a group. And with my
leadership, of course, as the coach and we were talking about really knowing yourself to be in your power because it always comes from the inside out. And when we're younger and in survival mode, and even as a teenager and young adult, we're trying to get to know ourselves, it's easy to let the external accolades and achievements and opinions even of just
family members, teachers, leaders, mentors, to define us, to give us our meaning, our purpose, what we're doing. And not that it's bad, but it's missing a part because it's dependent on outside. You have to do something. You have to get recognition from someone else. Something has to be done or seen or become
given to you by others to have any of that identity. And as we do that, it works until it doesn't. And for some, might work their whole life. But often for entrepreneurs, especially, and power women that want to create and do it from their soul and feel purpose and driven, we really have to get to know the real
true, authentic self inside of us, our soul, who we really are. But this is so pivotal because this is where all the power comes from. And so I wanted to talk about tonight why this is your source of power. This is the power woman inside of you. I even thought, should I say power self? Like, it's another way of saying it with my own kind of lingo, but really,
seeing this true essential self your authentic self and knowing her knowing her
and first comes to answer yourself, how well do you know her?
Often it's different for everybody. There's some people that feel like they can just talk to her and they hear another voice. almost sounds a little schizophrenic. I'm not saying it is, but that's probably how it is for me. The most is like, often there's just another voice I hear and it's just sentences I hear. But there are oftentimes where it is much more internal, more in my body and I can listen and feel.
and be connected with her.
And it's, it's a funny idea because I'm almost separating me from her, but we are one. There is no separate, but sometimes it helps our minds in our 3D thinking to see it as too distinct and saying me and her. And she is there with you always, but do you know her? Do you listen to her?
Do you give space for her?
I like to talk with her in journaling and that voice comes out when I'm just writing. And if you've ever experienced this, it feels like the pen is writing itself, like you're holding it and the words are coming out, but there's another deeper level of understanding and words coming as you do that. If you haven't experienced this, I invite you to try it.
I also love meditating and getting out of my head and the chatter that is in there. I have a label I've given myself as an over thinker. I'm trying not to use that label, but just say I am overthinking, but I am not an overthinking. I'm not embodying that. It's just something I do sometimes. But letting that go and really not listening to that chatter.
and feeling in my body and really dropping down into the sensations in our body, the feelings, the vibrations and listening.
and being at peace and centered there.
A practice I have started doing is to meditate in journal if I have the time. Sometimes I don't have the full time to journal or have the journal with me. But giving it variety of ways to do it every morning is just to ask her, connect with her, and say, hello. I'm listening. What is one thing I want to do today? An emphasis on want.
and one. This isn't from the external expectations or my to-do list, which sometimes I still have, but this is a much deeper inner purpose for my day from myself. Not from a boss, not from an agenda, not from my children or my husband, even though I love them and love helping them every day. This is just from me, my true authentic inner power.
myself and it's so fascinating to just see what one thing comes each day and sometimes she'll say girl you are pushing it too hard you need to slow down you need to recenter you're not really listening to me and if I'm taking the time to listen and hear that it's usually very true that it's finally catching up with me and I'm feeling the lack of that
And it's good to hear that from myself and listen to it. Sometimes she'll say, why haven't you done this yet? You know you want to do it. You know this feels true to you. You know this is possible for you. Why are you letting fear stop you? Let's do this. And working through any fears or worries that are blocking me from being my true self and doing that thing that I'm wanting to do that I know I'm going to create.
having this kind of relationship with yourself, can you imagine? And when you yourself are telling you to slow down, when you yourself are telling you, hey, I got you, let's do this, it's gonna happen, how much more powerful is that? It's not coming from someone else. It's not dependent on if you're a teacher's pet or somebody really likes you or you have all the,
esteem and accolades from others. You have this available to you 24 7. And you can check in and listen anytime, anyplace and listen to her.
So I wanted to give you three very specific things that I have seen this really does for you to have this relationship with yourself, to really know yourself. And the first is it is a true confidence. It is completely from the inside. And when you're really in this centered place, you see that you are enough. There is no question.
There is nothing you have to do or prove or change or fix. You are you and you are perfect the way you are. So then you get to go express and create and thrive and grow because you want to. This creates a centered confidence that nobody can give you. Nothing you achieve will really even come close to this kind of confidence.
And it's a true place of safety and love and acceptance that's coming from inside of you.
And you no longer rely or need anything from anybody else. It's just there within you. This
This kind of centered inner true confidence also helps you overcome ego based thoughts, fear based thoughts, comparison thoughts, competitive thoughts, where you have to be better or you're worse than other people or it matters what others are doing to feel good about yourself. You love yourself so much, you accept yourself so much, which actually gives you power to love and accept others more, to be who they are.
They don't have to change. They don't have to be anything different. They can be themselves as well. That is power. It just changes your whole relationship foundation because you are solid. You are loved. You are accepted. So then you have all of that love and acceptance to go give to others. It no longer requires to get it from others because you are giving it to yourself.
with this knowing of your true authentic self.
It also makes it so much easier to grow a business because you don't need the results of your business to feel good about yourself.
especially as an entrepreneur, this gives you so much power because I have watched so many people get the excitement of the idea. They start it, it looks like it's going to work and then it doesn't turn out how they thought it would and they give up.
And you often hear like the only failure is if you quit.
But what gives you the power to not quit? This, inner confidence, this knowing of who you are, doesn't matter how your business does. You feel that inner love and power and acceptance and you know who you are. And the business is an expression of that. You don't need it. And that gives you so much more power to try things, to do more confident and maybe, I don't like the word risky, but just,
more adventurous maybe things that come to you because you believe in yourself and you know yourself. You're safe with yourself. How many people can say that? It just changes everything in your life.
It also helps you know what you want. This came up on the call today, like I talked about, where we were talking about knowing our inner selves and many of the women said this was what was lacking the most for them was just knowing what they want. And one of the women specifically said like, am always taking care of what my kids want, what my husband wants, what my clients want, but I don't really know what I want.
How fascinating is that that we can be so attuned and aware and service driven for others, but to not even know what we want. And when you know your true inner aligned self, your future self.
She will tell you what you want. And the reason she can tell you what she wants is because she can see what happens in the future. And a lot of times people don't want to admit what they want because they don't think they deserve it or they don't think it's possible. And the first one, let's just get that rid of like, you deserve anything you want. We don't have to earn or be good enough or.
Do like a tally of like ratio of you give 90 % and you only get a cute 10%. Like where does this all these ideas come from? You can just deserve anything you want. All you have to do is know what it is and ask.
And then the fact that it's impossible, it's because it's something you haven't created yet or had yet. But why does that mean it's impossible? And I love to really emphasize this, but if it comes to you as a desire, it is because it's possible. Maybe not today, maybe not with how things are, but by putting it into motion, by first saying it is something you desire, you've already started things in motion to create it for you.
How cool does that sound? like, I love the examples I have from, I wanted to have a coaching business. So I just put things in motion and didn't even know what I was doing. And it was just so excited for it to start having clients to even fund things. Like I wanted a Tesla last year and we had just bought a van. So I just thought it was impractical. And I kept thinking about it, kept thinking about it. And then when my birthday came around, I just said, you know what?
It doesn't have to be practical. I want this, so I'm going to create it. And we went and bought a Tesla for my birthday. And it's been so fun to just drive my dream car around. I pay for and just because I wanted it. It doesn't have to be some noble altruistic desire. It can be as simple as I want to go on a trip with my family. Beginning of this year, I said,
I'm going to take my girls on a cruise. My husband doesn't like cruises. I love them. I wanted to take my daughters on a cruise and I booked it. We're going in August. It's happening. But I had to say I desired it first and then I created it and I said, okay, I need to make sure to have this much money. I need to make sure to have this all in place. And it wasn't hard, but I had to know one, what I desired and be okay with it. I was just saying it's okay to desire anything. And then it just happens.
Another thing I love to say with this is that what we desire and what we say, it will happen or something better. This is where we can trust and surrender and work with God and the universe to create what we desire. And so we're aligned with our real self, but we're also aligned with God. And this gives us so much access to our divinity, our creative power. And I've had examples in my life where I thought I wanted something and it didn't turn out just how I wanted.
And before I believed in all this and lived like this, it would have shut me down and said, I'm not good enough. I don't know what I'm doing. I can't create this. But now I really believe that I will get what I want or something better and being able to see how things are turning out better than I even thought, even than I desired at first gives so much power to being open and going for it and creating what you want or something better.
The third thing is that this makes you unstoppable. Really knowing your inner self, your true authentic self makes you unstoppable. And I wrote a post today on threads that I want to read to you because it, when it came to me, it was just so powerful. feel like threads has just given me this whole new access to myself to just get downloads, write it. I don't have to make any design for it or anything. I can just say what I want to say. And so this is what I said today.
If I could give a gift to every woman I know, it would not be fancy trips, cars, or even money. It would not be new clothes, a spa day, Botox, or even perfect health. It would not be better communication, best friends, or even a perfect marriage. It would be to have her connect with her true inner, now add, authentic self. Because there you can do anything.
and you are unstoppable, you are in full power. And you'll create the money, relationships and health you want from there. As the power woman you are. ⁓ I just love that so much. And that is the gift I am wanting to give to each of you listening right now. To really connect with your inner self, with your true authentic self, your divine
future, essential soul that is inside of you. This is where your power lies. And it is more valuable than any of those other things I listed because that is how you create exactly what you want in those areas. You might not want fancy trips. You might not want Botox. That might not be your thing, but you know what you want. And when you're aligned,
with your authentic self, you will create what you want. And that is unstoppable. That is power. That is what I hope this podcast, specifically this episode is doing for you every single time you listen. So I invite you as you listen to this to first try to connect with her, get to know her, learn how you can listen to her. For you, might be journaling. It might be more meditation. It might be just
gut feeling, an idea that isn't even with words. For everyone it is different. So you have to come to get to know yourself and make sure to let go of the labels. It is not the external things of how others see you. It is your centered internal self that is always there but that not all get to know. So first do that and then second start asking her
one thing to do every day. What do you want to do that day? And sometimes this is how I even move forward in my business. I'm saying, okay, I have this launch, I have this retreat I'm planning. What is the one thing I'm doing today to help create it? And trusting and surrendering to the divinity in me to guide me with one thing to do that day. And sometimes it's message this one woman.
Sometimes it's make this post, sometimes it's go work on that website. You know you want a good sales page for this. Or sometimes it's hire someone to do it for you. But learning to hear that intuition from yourself will change your life. Having a relationship like this with your true self will change your life. It will give you the inner confidence that everyone wants and looks for in external things and they
are missing what is there. It is always there, available inside. It will help you know what you want and to create what you want and to learn how to ask for it and be open to it and know what you want will come or something better. And it will make you unstoppable. This is the power woman you are. This is it.
I believe in this so much. I want to give this to every woman possible. It is the most valuable thing you could have. And it's what I want to give to you today as you listen to this. So take this, live it. And I hope this helps you to be the power woman you are to move forward to the next step you're wanting to take. And all I ask in return is that if this helped you today, that you share this episode.
with a friend directly or even on your stories on Instagram. Just tag me so I see it, say what it did for you. And so that I can know that this helped you and it will reach more people that way so they can listen to this too. Because imagine what would be different in this world if every woman had this kind of relationship and connection with her true self. The confidence, the power, the love.
as a collective of women, but individually. And we can't force it, we can't push it, we just live it as we embody it ourselves and share it with others. That's how it will spread. So Power Women, this is our mission, this is our purpose together. I love you and I will see you next week.
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